At any rate, I'm generally pretty composed and controlled with it. I usually just mumble things to myself which almost always include the word, idiot, or if it's an elderly person, I lean more toward- bless her heart- and subsequently pass without any outward signs of aggression. I mean, I don't think I'm ever going to be a road rage headline or anything like that, but I do avoid any bumper stickers that bear religious symbols or church affiliations. I think we all know our weaknesses and if I'm ever going to bring shame to the Christian faith, it will likely be when I'm driving behind someone who just won't GO!

Well, lately, I've noticed my character flaw has gotten worse. I'm finding myself to be really impatient with people behind the wheel, right now. I feel like I'm more on edge than usual. You don't have to look around very long to see that a lot of us are feeling that way. People are losing their cool over the least little things. We've talked about this recently, but I really think it's because we're seeing so much that makes us angry. Maybe we're not sitting and watching the news all day, but if we're online at all, we just can't help being exposed to headlines and videos that make us want to blow a gasket. It's everywhere. I think all of that just builds up- along with the frustrations of our current Covid situation and it seems like we've become less gracious than normal. 

Well, I had my breaking point, the other day. I was driving and got caught behind this large pick-up truck. It was about the length of a naval ship and there was no way for me to get around him as I clocked him at 14 mph in a 35. Not only was his rate of speed painfully slow, but he applied his brakes at each and every intersection to give himself a moment to decide if he needed to turn or not and making us catch red lights galore. I promise there have been faster funeral processions than this two-vehicle parade I was caught riding in and I was on pace to be late for an appointment. Finally, I'd had it. He applied his brakes and stopped to think about his route, one too many times, and I just laid down on the horn. I don't know what came over me. I could see by his license plate that he was from out of town, but he got no hospitality from me. I know that all of my southern belle ancestors (and especially the royal Scottish ones) rolled over in their graves at that moment. Me acting so rudely- and right there in broad daylight. For the infuriating driver and whoever else was around there to hear, I played a high C with my horn and held it for at least 4 measures. Now, I didn't roll the window down or extend any fingers toward him. I'm not that distasteful. But, my frustration had built up to the point where it had to come out and the horn was my outlet.

Davis and I are back to empty-nesting. It was hard, at first. It was like we had to get used to Carson being gone all over again, but we're back in our groove now. It's just us and our Ruby. The horn incident reminded me of a walk we went on with her. We were taking a stroll, one evening, and Ruby stopped to take care of some serious personal business. She took her stance and we looked away to give her some privacy. She always looks so embarrassed when we watch. I mean, I can understand a woman needs a minute. Well, it seemed to be taking longer than usual. And she appeared to be struggling. Not to be too graphic, but when she continued walking and ran ahead of us, we noticed there was something still hanging from back there. Again, I do apologize for such unpleasant talk as I'm sure my mother has fallen out onto the floor about now, but you'll want to hear this. "Oh, my word. Please, tell me that's not some sort of worm, Davis." He called Ruby over to check her out and assist with the problem. We both looked closely. "Whatever it is looks like it was once a bright yellow. And it's long- and twisted up really tight. What in the world could that be? Oh, my stars! It has words on it. Does that say Gene??" We got a stick to try and unravel the mystery some more. "General? Dollar General??!!"  It seems Ruby had eaten a Dollar General bag. Don't ask me how she didn't choke on it and die. Don't ask me how she didn't have an obstruction and die. Certainly don't ever ask me why she does anything she does. But, my best guess is that there was the slightest bit of good food on the bag and so she consumed the whole thing-savory and unsavory- to get the little morsel of good out of it and it ended up making quite an unpleasant exit. It was a painful and laborious lesson for Ruby and us, too, that what goes in must come out.  

In a roundabout and odd sort of way, that sounded kind of familiar. We may be consuming really good and uplifting things online, but we're also choking down big chunks of bad to get to it. Whether we realize it or not, it affects us and can build to an unpleasant exit. What goes in will eventually come out. Dollar General bag in. Dollar General bag out. Negativity in. Negativity out. Anger in. Anger out.

I wish I had the answers to avoiding the antagonizing pulls of this modern web world we live in. Short of having cable disconnected, internet service discontinued, and pulling our old Nokia 3310 back out of the drawer, I just don't know. I do know that, recently, I've been guilty of not always extending understanding to other people and I have to think it's because of some of the things I'm consuming. Even if it's being digested along the way to some really good stuff, it still has an effect on me. I have to recognize there's an undercurrent of frustration for everyone, right now, and I, especially, as God's child, have to make every effort toward giving grace as freely as it's been given to me.   

Starting behind the wheel. At 14 mph.           

Y'all have a RELAXING Labor Day weekend!