Wednesday, February 8, 2017

R is for Random and Rambling

So, my friend, Michelle, who I talked about in my last post, was in town on Tuesday.  I enjoyed lunch with her, her son, and "her Carolyn".  We were seated at our table and she told me she had something for me as she reached down in her purse and came out with this.  So precious!  She said I could share with you all.....
Over the last few days, I've run into quite a few people around town who've wanted to talk about their Type 1 or Type 2 mothers......or how they hover or don't......or their preference or disdain for the automatic toilet.  I've even had a few to tell me that they have thought about me while using a public restroom, this week.  How touching that know I was thought of in there.  The bathroom post seemed to strike a chord.  Apparently, it was way past time we spoke publicly about these things and came together as one around the issue of the public throne.  

There were terrible storms all over the South on Tuesday, too.  Sugar, our phobic dog, spent most of the early morning sitting on my head and hyperventilating.  It seems she's under the impression that in order to achieve maximum closeness to someone, she must situate herself atop their skull.  Sometimes, when that's not quite close enough, she will attempt to "dig" into your head with her front claws so that she can get even closer as your brain, your inner most being.  I'm sure some of you can relate to a dog with storm issues. 
When I found out that there had been tornados in New Orleans, my first thought was, of course, if my son-in-law-to-be was ok.  He was fine and then when I learned there were no fatalities, my mind went to the 300 year old trees under which the wedding will take place but when the plantation posted that they'd been unaffected by the storms, I was relieved.  The mighty oaks have stood proud for over three centuries and we just need them to, at least, hang on for a few months more.    
Blair and I ran in Dillard's, last night, because there was this dress she wanted to buy.  When we got done in there, we walked down to Bath & Body Works.  I don't know if you've tried their aromatherapy shampoo but I absolutely love it!  The orange ginger and the eucalyptus spearmint are the best.  Anyway, while we were in there, two men stumbled in and then they kind of backed out like they weren't sure that was where they needed to be.  But, it was too late.  They were immediately greeted at the door by one of the zealous saleswomen.  "Y'all come on back in here!  I know two strapping men like you are sure to need something for Valentine's Day!"  They kind of turned the color of a valentine and then laughed about being called strapping as it certainly wasn't an adjective you'd use to describe these two. I have to insert here that I am fascinated with watching men shop for their significant other.  I suppose it comes from years of working in retail and the floral business but it is a hobby of mine.  Some people study the migratory patterns of the ruby-throated hummingbird while I prefer to observe the special occasion shopping patterns of the man. 

Well, before you knew it, one sales lady had one of the poor men in the corner by the foaming soaps and the other guy was with another associate and she was spraying body sprays into the air for him to smell.  They bounced around the store with the men and, every now and then, I would hear one of the women say something like, "Oh, if you get her this, you'll be THE MAN!  She will LOVE you!" or "I don't know ANY woman who doesn't love a candle!"  At one point, I heard one of the gentlemen ask in his southern drawl, "Is she supposed to bathe in this or what?"  He was in the aromatherapy section and so Blair and I gave an unsolicited testimonial for the shampoo. 

Well, I made my little purchase and, as I was leaving, I looked over and the men had their bags full and were being talked into some impulse items near the register.  I thought, "Now, won't their ladies be surprised when they come home on Valentine's Day with enough soap to bathe the inhabitants of the seven continents?"  

So, listen, there will be a couple of Mississippi ladies out there whose men will present them with a Valentine gift of an unusually large quantity of random fragrant items.  Just know that if it happens to be you, next Tuesday, that he was just walking by when a saleswoman told him he was strapping and that, my dear, is how you're going to end up with whatever it is and for how ever long it takes to use it all.  I saw the whole thing with my own eyes. 

I guess we never really know what our guys are told when they're out shopping for us.  Just know that whatever he gets you, he probably just wanted to be THE MAN. 

Your man. 

And isn't that sweet?     

Y'all have a great weekend!     




  1. Spot on Joni! I hope the men will get a big hug from their ladies:). You do speak for the people of their concerns! Oh my gosh, Blair will a beautiful Southern wedding, gorgeous!
    Poor pup, thunderstorms can sound very scary for little ones ( even big ones ).
    Have a wonderful sanitizing day:).
    Kathleen in Az

    1. Thanks, Kathleen! It's always good hearing from you!