Sunday, March 25, 2018

Or Die Trying

Well, prom is in a couple of weeks and Carson's date had recently said yes to a dress, so it was time for us to go tackle the comparatively light task of outfitting Carson for the big night. I decided that Saturday would be the day we'd conquer that. I knew it wouldn't be his first choice of things he'd want to do on a Saturday morning, but I promised food at the end of our excursion, because everyone knows taking a teenage boy out for lunch will make just about any task tolerable. Even having one's inseam measured.

So, with a small swatch of the dress color in my hand, we got out of the car across the street from the formal wear shop. Did I mention it was a blustery day? Well, it was. Awfully blustery. The wind was really whipping and, as we walked across the busy street, it caught hold of the tiny piece of material and away it went. Oh, my word. It was all that we had to work with and there it was blowing around the busy downtown street like a tumbleweed.

Well, I'd already been bragging publicly about the ease of being the boy mother and here I was messing up at my cushy job. So, putting all fears for my own personal safety aside, I decided to run after the fabric sample.....wherever the wind would take us. First, it went this way and then that way and I zig-zagged to try and keep up with it. I knew if I lost sight of it, even for a second, it was all over. Soon, I found myself in a real life game of chicken as I raced toward an oncoming car. I knew I must have looked like a fool, but I decided to bet all my chips on the driver braking for the lunatic running toward her in the middle of the road. The bad thing is that the sample was so small that the drivers couldn't see what I was chasing. They just saw a nutcase looking down at the ground, while weaving through traffic.

About that time, I heard Carson yelling behind me, "Mom, don't get killed running after it." I thought, "What a sensible child, he is and, under normal circumstances, he'd be so right, but I cannot fail at this. This is such an easy, easy job description, with which I've been charged."  I could almost hear my friend, Laurie, aka his date's mother, taunting, "You had one job."

As luck would have it or, more likely, by the merciful hand of God, the wind took a slight southern shift and blew the swatch up under a parked car, so I stepped out of the road, so that normal traffic could resume. I mean, parked cars are much less likely to hurt you, so that was a good development. I had it cornered between the front tires of a Mustang and just waited until the wind blew it right at my feet, at which point, I stomped on it with all my might to snag it once and for all.

A bit grimy and a little damp from what I hoped was rain water, we proceeded into the store with the tattered color swatch in hand. Of course, the store front was all glass and a couple of young, millennial associates had been standing behind the front desk enjoying the death defying show I'd been performing in the middle of the street. I knew this by the sizable grins they were wearing as we walked through the door, but I couldn't be bothered with them and just grinned back as if to say, "I believe you have a little dab of Tide pod on your lip."

So, as Carson got measured and made his color selections using the runaway, ragged swatch, I looked around the shop. Everywhere I looked, there were girls in flashy gowns standing on elevated platforms, looking into three way mirrors with their mothers looking on and holding all the purses. I've held some purses in my time, so I knew there was no telling how long they'd been there or how many dresses they'd tried on or how many other stores they'd shopped. Granted, it may have cost me a jog into approaching traffic, but I knew I'd be getting out of there a lot sooner and a heck of a lot cheaper than every single one of them.

We were all done there and I suggested we go by the florist, order the corsage, and then we'd have all of his boxes checked as far as prom was concerned. We were just a couple of blocks away and so we were there in no time. We went in and, after telling the lady what we needed, she directed us to the corsage bar. Oooo, fancy. I'm not sure if you're familiar, but it's an area they set up around prom time, which consists of all manner of ribbons, jewels, feathers, and other adornments available in a rainbow of colors in order to customize your date's corsage.

So, Carson and I sidled up to the bar and I could tell he was kind of zoning out, at this point. I mean, it's one thing to pick out a tie and pocket square, but choosing between organza and satin ribbon and deciding if feathers or rhinestones would be a prettier accent in a wrist corsage, well, that's a little more than a young man can handle on a Saturday morning....or any morning, really. Especially, when lunch is just on the other side of the decision. So, together, we got everything selected, checked our last box, and headed back to the car.

I looked at the clock as I drove him to his edible reward and it was 11:48. We'd started our list of 2 tasks at around 11:10....I mean, if you want to count the time we spent running down the middle of the street. Either way, it took 38 minutes.....tops.....to complete the traditional male prom responsibilities.

Someone pinch me.

So.....I'm just thankful to be here and wish you a blessed Easter week.


We'll talk again soon.
 

    

4 comments:

  1. I'm glad you got everything accomplished. I love this post!

    ReplyDelete
  2. You have such a delightful way with words! I sooo enjoy this blog. Truly one of my few favorites! Thank you!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Oh, thank you so much, Shelley! That means a lot to me. :)

      Delete


Follow by Email!
Powered by Blogger.

Popular Posts

Blog Archive

Browse through all the blog posts over the years

view all

Labels

Labels