I remember my 21st birthday. It doesn’t seem like that long ago, but it was. Don’t you ever wish you could go back and do things over knowing what you know now?  I tried to think of what I’d tell my 21 year old self now that I’m slightly older. First off, I’d probably slap her and tell her she’s not as smart as she thinks she is. I’d assure her that she has so much to learn. I’d tell her not to worry about stuff so much or take things too seriously- good or bad- nothing lasts forever. I’d promise her that with every year of living comes a greater sense of calm and a lesser tendency to sweat the small stuff. I’d remind her not to waste time because it goes by lightning fast and she’ll have these crazy chin hairs coming out of nowhere that’ll rival the grass coverage in her yard before she can turn around. I’d tell her to keep up the good work with taking a lot of pictures because, one day, they’ll be the only way to look into some of the faces she loves. I’d assure her that the things that are really big stressors for her now likely won’t even matter in a year or even a month, so don’t get bogged down with them. I’d really emphasize the truth behind what Eleanor Roosevelt said- “You wouldn’t worry so much about what others think of you if you realized how seldom they do.” I’d tell her to not to get busy and let up in visiting her grandparents- to write down the things they tell her- and that they’re precious links to her past that are gone too soon. I’d give her a reminder that what she puts in relationships is what she can expect to get out of them. I’d advise her to really watch her words- they can never be taken back so measure them carefully before dispensing. I’d warn her to never get so busy that she can’t spare some time for the people she loves. I’d tell her not to always take the safe road but to stick her neck out a little, every now and then. I’d describe to her how painful the feeling of regret is and urge her to seize opportunities as they come. I’d ask her not to get cranky with her parents and remind her that she won’t really know how hard they work or how much they love her until she’s paying for her own insurance and waiting on her own children to get home from prom. I’d tell her that with all the paths ahead, the choices to make, and the blanks to fill in that God is always for her and always with her.

I decided to ask some friends what they’d tell their 21 year old selves. I got a lot of good answers. 

-God’s way really is the best way and it’s designed to protect us.

-Don’t spend time worrying about things you can’t control. 

-It’s all just a season. Enjoy it while you have it, or suck it up while it lasts, but know that change will come. This too shall pass. 

-Pray more and worry less. 

-Don’t be gullible.

-Get the dog. 

-Everyone doesn’t need to know your opinion on everything all the time. 

-Be more considerate of others. 

-Choose your friends wisely. They rub off. 

-You’re not the center of the universe. 

-Live your life without worrying about what other people say or think. 

-Enjoy this time and have fun. 

-Don’t be overly cautious. Sometimes, throw it to the wind. 

That would probably be good advice for all 21 year olds and most of us who are slightly older, too. I guess in Carson’s case, I’d warn him that he’ll be telling Dad jokes and wearing white leather Reeboks and blue jean shorts before he knows it. Before he can bat an eye, his kids will be having to repeat things, his calendar will be full of doctor appointments, and he’ll develop a growing obsession with gas mileage and the weather radar. But, for now, you’re 21, son. Seize the day, the moments, the opportunities, the relationships. And wherever you go, go with God. 

Happy Weekend and Go Bulldogs! 

JONI