Tuesday, June 8, 2021
Thoughts From Between 18 and 88
I asked you to pray for our friend, Tim, last week. Sadly, Tim passed away over the weekend after a sudden, unexpected illness. It always seems to me like death that we don’t see coming hits harder than the kind for which we have time to brace ourselves. I appreciate everyone who messaged me that they were praying for him. Please replace those prayers with prayers for his family. He and his wife, Sherry, have always been among my very favorites and, from where I’m sitting, Tim just had too much left to give to be taken, but God has ordained our days and we trust Him. Tim was one of those people who could do anything. He was very wise, genuine, strong, funny, and lovable. He was a man of God- steady, consistent, and honorable. He was one of the good guys.
Sherry and I were in a women’s weekly bible study together for a decade or so. Having gone to church together, I’d always loved and admired her, too, and our time in that group only grew and cemented my respect for her. I was the youngest of all the ladies- the others were 10 or more years older, so Tim and Sherry were a little further down the path of life than me, but so young at heart. Tim was 70.
Today, I considered how much age changes our thinking. When my Daddy died soon after his 71st birthday, I was just arriving on the scene of my 40’s. I remember thinking that he wasn’t old, but he’d lived a pretty long life. To my 40 year old eyes, 71 seemed like quite a generous number of years. As Davis and I sat at Tim’s funeral today, I realized how much my perspective on age had shifted in just 12 years. Seventy suddenly seems quite young. And my Grandmother died at 79- the age my mother is now. At 34, I considered her to be quite elderly at 79. At 53, my mother doesn’t seem nearly as old as I considered Grandmother to be at that same age. Funny how the years skew the way we view life.
Last week on June 2, some of my high school classmates were posting that it had been 35 years since our graduation. I was with one of our two class valedictorians over the weekend and we both agreed that we certainly don’t feel like it’s been that long. I remembered my parents going to their 35th reunion and thinking- “my soul, how could anybody be that old?” In my mind, I feel like I’m still in my 20’s or 30’s, but it doesn’t take long for my body to remind me that, clearly, I am not. If those 35 years have gone by that fast, then how much faster will the next 35 go- which will take me to age 88- probably in the activity room of some retirement facility doing chair aerobics and wondering why my children haven’t called.
I suppose recent events just have my thoughts rambling about the increasing speed of life. Davis and I talked about his retirement plans over our lunch today. That seems to be a popular topic of conversation among our friends, these days- how many years before you retire? The 18 year old in the picture thought that she had so much longer before she’d be discussing things like that with her husband.
So, here I am halfway between 18 and 88. I feel like I’ve been living more intentionally, the last couple of years. I suppose with the emergence of my 50’s came a stronger sense of urgency to make the days count. The last week has given some reminders of that. We exchange every day for something- either something hollow or something lasting. May we make good exchanges with our time. Like Tim.
Blair and John Samuel have a picture hanging in their house that I think has a good word for us all-
“This is the beginning of a new day. You have been given this day to use as you will. You can waste it or use it for good. What you do today is important. When tomorrow comes, this day will be gone forever. In its place is something that you have left behind. Let it be something good.”
Y’all have a good week.
JONI
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ReplyDeleteSuch truth in this post, Joni. I’m sorry for the loss of your friend. Thankful you’ll see him again one day soon.
ReplyDelete