Thursday, March 26, 2015

A String of Pertinent Topics

Well, it's official.  Blair has informed me that she has purchased her Easter dress.  Everyone can now exhale.  I know this is something that's been weighing heavy upon all of your minds.

I start to look for Easter clothes for everyone else, once the color scheme has been set by Blair.  Being the fashion pinnacle of our family, we take our cues from her.  We're kind of like her prom date.  We wait for her to choose her dress and then try our best to coordinate.  Not that we're all matchy-matchy, but we do strive to not show up on Easter morning looking like the flag of Italy or a bowl of Peanut M&M's.        

So, this year's color.......(drum roll, please)........yellow.  This was phoned in from our fashion headquarters just this week. 

Never mind that my skin fades to the color of a marshmallow when I wear yellow.  It's not really on my fashion color wheel, so I'm going to look for a color that lives near yellow on the wheel....perhaps a next door neighbor of yellow. 

I've looked around and found a couple of things that might work.  I took them into the dressing room and you know how you do.  I wanted to take off as few clothes as possible, so I only removed the clothing from the waist up and then slipped the dress over my head.  To get a more accurate picture, I dropped my pants down around my ankles and stepped back to admire myself in the full length mirror.  Oh......what a lovely vision, I was!  A dress in a lovely sea foam shade of green, with ten tags sticking up into my neck, a bag of extra buttons hanging from my armpit, a security sensor, my hair going in many directions, black linen pants puddled around my ankles at the bottom of legs the color of an Easter lily.....all accentuated by flattering, blue fluorescent, commercial lighting.  "Oh, yes", I said to myself...."this is, indeed, the look I was going for to celebrate the resurrection".        

Carson had an allergy appointment out of town today , so we made a day of it.  And for any of our school officials, who may be reading.....when I say "we made a day of it", what I really meant to say was that his appointment lasted for 7 hours!  Anyway, anytime you make a day of something with a boy, it will always involve food and usually from a place that you don't have back where you live.  In today's case, it was Mellow Mushroom. 

After we committed gluttonous sins there, we went shopping for some new spring clothes for, t-shirts, shorts.  He wanted a suit for Easter and so we found a khaki suit that fit nicely and, of course, a yellow tie in keeping with our assigned theme.  We had a good time together on our mother/son food fest/shopping boondoggle.

It's funny how different son time and daughter time can be.  After the second clothing store stop, Carson was like......"Ok, I have enough clothes now.  Let's don't go anywhere else".  Those words would never, I repeat, ever fall out of Blair's mouth.  She will shop as long as you're willing or until she loses consciousness, whichever comes first.

And then there's the difference in conversation topics with daughters and sons.  With daughters you might talk about boys, parties, friends, outfits, family, grades, dances, plans, problems, makeup, school, family, or the future.  Boys.....well, they're a little more basic.  Their repertoire is more, sports, sports equipment, Xbox, food.  And today, Carson broached another subject that I'd never talked about with Blair before.  The topic was.........smells we like.  Now, that's just something that doesn't come up much between women and it's a shame, really.  It's a fine topic, which stimulates a lot of discussion.  If we hadn't spent the day together, I might never have known that he likes the smell of burning matches, a fresh can of tennis balls, and gasoline.  I don't guess I should be worried about that combination.  I threw in freshly cut grass, hamburgers on a charcoal grill, new cars, and Christmas trees.  So, yeah....we, thoroughly, enjoyed that discussion. 

We got home and took Sugar walking because, well, she's taken on the shape of a bowling ball over the course of the winter.  She can tend to teeter on the edge of being antisocial, so I always like watching her interact with the other dogs in the neighborhood when we walk.  Today, I made some observations and would like to share just a few of the things that dogs do that I'm glad, we, humans, don't do......

*  I'm glad we don't relieve ourselves on our friends' shrubs to let them know we stopped by while they were gone.  A note saying, "Sorry I missed you" is so much classier.
*  I'm glad that men don't lie out in the grass, scratching and licking themselves.

*  I'm glad we don't run to the edge of our yards when our friends walk down the street and yell at them and show them our teeth.... only to have them turn around and yell back and show us their teeth.
*  I'm glad it's not customary that we smell our neighbors every time we see them and then they smell us back and then we all go smell everyone's mailboxes together.  Frankly, I just don't have time for all that and it does have the potential to get awkward.
*  I'm glad I don't have to use my foot to scratch my ears or scoot across the grass to scratch my backside.  I don't think there's any way to elaborate on that. 

* I'm glad we, women, don't have to recoup from birthing 7 children in one day in the garage on a pillow and a couple of old beach towels.

*  I'm glad that we don't dig holes to bury our chocolate, but utilize the more advanced system of hiding it in our closet, in the boot box at the very back of the bottom shelf, stuffed way down inside the right boot....not the left.

*  I'm glad that my people don't throw things and expect me to run and pick them up.  Oh, wait...never mind.

*  I'm glad that I don't have to use my tail to express my emotions.

 *  I'm glad I can control my drool, most days.  

Well, I guess that's about all I have to say about that. 

And since we're not even trying to pretend, at this point, that this post holds any merit.....I have one more thing.  If you and Sweetos haven't been introduced, let me do the honor.  Buttery, cinnamon toast in a bag.  Get some.  You will proclaim me as your new best friend on Monday.     
Well, thank goodness, it's Friday since, alas, we seemed to have reached the bottom of our subject barrel for this week. 

Hope y'all have a restful (and cinnamon-y) weekend with your families! 





  1. Blair is a very beautiful young Lady and I'm sure her fashion sense is spot on. Having a day with your son and be able to talk with him is very special. Your comparison with our pets is so funny and true. Have a beautiful Spring weekend Joni, Kathleen in Az

  2. Thanks so much, Kathleen! And we really enjoyed our weekend. Hope you did the same!